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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26822614">you mocha me crazy</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/supernova_stars/pseuds/supernova_stars'>supernova_stars</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>to the end of time (to the end of the earth) [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Trolls (Movies 2016 2020)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Oblivious Queen Poppy (Trolls), Pretty much everyone is in this</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 10:27:03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,788</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26822614</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/supernova_stars/pseuds/supernova_stars</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Barb watches, with exasperation and impatience, as Branch and Poppy slowly but surely fall in love. </p><p>In the middle of a coffee shop, no less. What a bunch of disasters.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Branch/Queen Poppy (Trolls), Queen Barb/Carol (Trolls)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>to the end of time (to the end of the earth) [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2053788</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>you mocha me crazy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A couple of blocks away from Town Square is a quaint little coffee shop dubbed 'Harmony Café'. </p><p>It's been around for decades, according to the locals, and Barb is sure that maybe once upon the 1950's, Harmony Café was once a really popular coffee shop that sported striped teal wallpaper and cutesy pastel pink tables and chairs along with lovely hanging plants and a retro aesthetic. </p><p>Nowadays it had to live with trashy 'aquamarine' wallpaper  -because the guy who was supposed to fix the chipping paint had gotten the shade wrong - and slightly wobbly chairs that weren't really as fashionable as they were back then. </p><p>The hanging plants are more or less dead now, and they get replaced every once in a while but Barb is sure that no one really pays that much attention to them anymore. The wall on the back of the building is also a graffiti hotspot, which would be cool if everyone in this town wasn't lame and incapable of tagging something other than positive messages and flowers. </p><p> </p><p>Barb works here, unfortunately. It's pretty much the best option she's got because Dad's still sick and moving from Rocksville to Troll Town to attend college was never going to be easy. The fact that she's graduated doesn't mean all her money troubles have disappeared into thin air, either. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It's not all bad, though. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>There's a jukebox in the corner of the shop, and if she's lucky, a customer with good taste will come in and play Heart's <em>Barracuda</em>. </p><p> </p><p>Sometimes a cute chick will walk in and compliment Barb's hair. That's always a satisfying ego boost. </p><p> </p><p>Her co-workers, however, are surprisingly the least terrible aspect of working at Harmony Café . </p><p> </p><p>DJ's cool. She has better music taste than the rest of them, and she sometimes comes over to Barb's apartment and jams with her for hours on the roof. </p><p>Cooper's weird, but like. In a good way. He's chill and funny and also has no problems with fire, which automatically makes him okay in Barb's book. </p><p>Smidge is super buff and takes shit from no one. Barb likes her. </p><p> </p><p>And then there's Poppy and Branch. </p><p> </p><p>Ohhhh, boy. Where does she begin with those two? </p><p> </p><p>Poppy's like a squirrel on crack sometimes. She's got (admittedly, pretty fucking cool) bright pink hair and big brown eyes and puts edible glitter in her coffee along with copious amounts of sugar and whipped cream like some kind of maniac. She dresses in bright colors and wears sparkly light-up sneakers and adorns her wrists with Silly Bandz and charm bracelets. </p><p>She also likes singing and dancing and she has no concept of personal space.</p><p>(If Poppy weren't so obnoxious and unknowingly patronizing sometimes, she might've even been Barb's type.) </p><p> </p><p>Branch, the manager, is basically Poppy's polar opposite. He's got a resting bitch face and tanned skin and black hair that stands in unruly cowlicks and he dresses in the same grey shirt and ratty green jacket almost every day. He has ice blue eyes with dark circles underneath, and tends to snap irritably at people whenever he can. </p><p>He's also a conspiracy theorist and a stickler for the rules,  and Barb would've found him annoying if he wasn't so intimidating and scarily smart. Seriously, give that man a good week of sleep and maybe a crowbar and he'd be overthrowing the government and ruling the world in a few days, tops. </p><p> </p><p>Anyways, Poppy and Branch are like day and night. Poppy thinks Branch is weird and paranoid and needs to lighten up, and in turn Branch thinks Poppy and her friends are loud and relentlessly irritating and hopelessly idiotic. They supposedly don't get along all that well, which is only worsened by the fact that they live in the same apartment complex.</p><p> </p><p>If Barb was a simpleton, she'd describe them as rivals. </p><p>Enemies. </p><p>With time and appreciation, possibly even friends. </p><p> </p><p>But Barb is an intellectual, and not the lame kind, thank-you, and because of this she'd describe them as idiots. </p><p> </p><p>Idiots who are obviously, clearly, <em>madly in love with each other</em> and neither of them have realized it yet. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>-</p><p>It starts on Monday, because most things do. </p><p>Poppy is singing along to some garbage pop song on the jukebox, her friends all joining in with preppy moves and head bops, as though this slander is enjoyable to these uncultured peasants-</p><p>Barb hates it. </p><p>From the look on Branch's face, however, she's clearly not the only one who feels that way. </p><p> </p><p>He marches over to them and more or less tells them to shut the fuck up or the jukebox is gone by tomorrow. Harsh, but fair. </p><p>The rest of them clearly don't see it that way, however, because for the rest of the day, they all badmouth Branch in one way or another. </p><p>"Always ruins everything-"</p><p>"Wonder how he walks with such a huge stick up his ass-"</p><p>"That guy is crazy, I'm telling you-" </p><p>"People would probably like him more if he was nicer, why can't he see that?-"</p><p> </p><p>Everyone except Poppy, that is. </p><p>Hell, she seems to be the only person aside from Barb who can see that they're legitimately hurting his feelings- even if he won't show it. </p><p>She tells them to knock it off more than once, and they only actually listen to her once Barb starts 'accidentally' bitch-slapping everyone until the badmouthing gradually decreases. </p><p>Poppy smiles at her, though she also reprimands her, and even if Branch doesn't say it or show it, he's grateful too. </p><p>When Barb has her coat on and is about to leave near the end of the day, she overhears a snippet of conversation from the back room.</p><p>"-really sorry about how everyone was treating you, it was... really uncool, in hindsight." </p><p>Awkward shuffling. </p><p>A gruff, flippant voice cues in. "...It's fine. Thanks, I guess. You're not terrible." </p><p> </p><p>Now, there's a very good chance someone slipped crack cocaine into Barb's coffee earlier because there is no way she just heard <em>Poppy Kingsley</em>  apologize to <em>Branch Madera. </em><em><br/>
</em></p><p>And there's no way <em>Branch Madera</em>  was 1) totally forgiving and 2) actually complimented <em>Poppy Kingsley. </em></p><p> </p><p>Right?</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p>It escalates on a Thursday, at Barb's 7 a.m. shift.  </p><p> </p><p>She shares this shift with Branch and Smidge respectively, so it startles her a little when she pushes open the door -ignoring the dumb little bell that rings every time she does so- and spots Poppy in all her sparkly chipmunk glory instead of a brooding conspiracy theorist. </p><p> </p><p>Barb glances over to the clock at the top of the wall. It's 6:59. Which means Poppy got here early like a complete nerd. <em>To Branch's shift.  </em></p><p> </p><p>(Now, before people come in and start accusing Barb of <em>also</em> being a nerd, she'd just like to clarify that she's only here early because her goody-two-shoes roommate set off eight alarms for her and no matter how much Barb would just like to just sleep in for another hour or two, it is physically impossible for her to sleep through<em> We're All In This Together </em>from<em> High School Musical </em> blasting at top volume at 6:30 in the morning.)</p><p> </p><p>Barb strolls up to the counter and casually leans against the marble surface. "Yo." </p><p> </p><p>Poppy, predictably, lights up like a Christmas tree when she sees Barb. "Hey, girl! How are you?" </p><p> </p><p>Barb doesn't respond to that last bit because she's cool and has a reputation to maintain. "Hey, what happened to Branch? It's not like him to skip a shift."</p><p> </p><p>It really wasn't. The world could be ending via Zombie Apocalypse and Branch would still show up to work. To be fair, he'd also be sporting a gas mask, several bottles of hand sanitizer and a machete, along with a smug "I told you so," but she digresses.</p><p> </p><p>Poppy nods her head in agreement, pink hair bouncing. "Yeah, usually. He's having a really rough week. I figured he could use a break, so I offered to cover for him." </p><p> </p><p>Barb blinks in shock. "You offered to cover for him." </p><p> </p><p>"Yup!" </p><p> </p><p>"And he said yes."</p><p> </p><p>"Mmhmm!" Poppy hums an affirmative. </p><p> </p><p>"Even though he's not sick or bleeding to death or in the hospital having his legs amputated?"</p><p> </p><p>"Er... yes?"</p><p> </p><p>Now, Barb has only worked here for two weeks, so maybe she doesn't know Branch as well as the others, who have supposedly known him since childhood. </p><p>But she does know that he's nothing if not stubborn and extremely devoted to his job (or pretty much anything, really). She once saw him show up with a sling around his arm and still manage to work the register because of course the fucker would train himself to be ambidextrous. </p><p>So the fact that Poppy, his supposed rival, came over and managed to get him to take a <em>mental health day</em>, is truly, utterly groundbreaking. Seriously, does Poppy not realize how much power she has?</p><p> </p><p>Barb regains her cool, collected composure. Stands upright. "Yeah, whatever. I'm gonna go put on my uniform." </p><p> </p><p>Poppy wiggles her fingers in a 'good-bye' gesture, even though Barb will be back relatively soon. Poppy is weird like that.</p><p> </p><p>She throws on her apron and slides on her nametag, the one that says Barbara instead of Barb because it makes her sound 'friendlier' and 'saner'. It also makes her sound like someone's Grandma, but if she's still getting tips at the end of the day, then she's not going to complain.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Maybe three hours later, just minutes before the end of her shift, Barb spots Poppy in the back room, the sleeves of her fuchsia cardigan tied around her waist, placing a small silver thermos in a paper bag. </p><p> </p><p>"What's that?" Barb asks. </p><p> </p><p>Poppy whirls around, pink ponytail <em>whishing</em> with the motion. Her face is tinged with pink. </p><p> </p><p>(That, combined with the white shirt and fuchsia cardigan and trademark hair makes Poppy look like a flamingo, or something.)</p><p> </p><p>"I- Well. I, um- you see, I was just... I was trying to... you know Branch<em>?</em>" </p><p> </p><p>Barb cocks an unimpressed eyebrow. "Yeah, obviously. What about him?" </p><p> </p><p>"Yeah, I. Uh. Made some soup the other day, and I had some extra, and I know he doesn't like cupcakes all that much so I thought some soup would make him feel better, cause it always makes me feel better when <em>I'm</em> feeling under the weather and- sorry, I'm rambling." </p><p> </p><p>"Yep. You sure are."</p><p> </p><p>Poppy scratches the back of her neck and ducks her head in embarrassment. </p><p> </p><p>It suddenly hits Barb that Poppy wouldn't really be embarrassed about this unless there were personal reasons involved. </p><p>Maybe she accidentally deeply insulted him. </p><p>Maybe she called him by the wrong name by accident.</p><p> </p><p>... Or <em>maybe</em>, Princess Pink has a <em>crush</em>. </p><p> </p><p>Oh God, it all makes sense now.</p><p> </p><p>Barb can't fight the smirk that makes its way onto her face. "Branch, huh?"</p><p> </p><p>Poppy nods a little too enthusiastically. "Yup! Branch, our very good friend and coworker who we all know. Haha." </p><p> </p><p>Barb teasingly nudges Poppy's shoulder on her way to the coat rack. "Whatever you say, weirdo." </p><p> </p><p>Poppy practically sprints out the door.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It only gets better. </p><p> </p><p>On Friday, Branch comes back to work. He hangs up his ratty green jacket on the hanger and throws on his baby blue apron and still manages to look intimidating. Barb has mad respect for him. </p><p> </p><p>Just as he's about to step out of the back room, Poppy runs up to him and throws her arms around his torso, smiling and squeezing tight. Branch looks surprised at first, before his expression slips into a tired, exasperated expression. </p><p>"Poppy," he mutters flatly. </p><p> </p><p>He's clearly trying to sound annoyed, but it doesn't fully sound that way. </p><p> </p><p>"Heya, Branch! I'm glad you're feeling better," she chirps, words slightly muffled due to her face squishing against Branch's chest. </p><p> </p><p>"Let go of me," he says. Interestingly enough, he doesn't violently push her away. </p><p>Poppy complies regardless, flashes him one more luminescent smile, then skips away. </p><p>Barb will swear on her electric guitar that the corners of Branch's mouth had quirked upwards in a fond little smile of his own before it slid back into his usual blank expression. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Later, when she and Branch are alone together in the supply room, Barb jumps him in a tight hug. Just to test a theory.</p><p> </p><p>She's both intrigued and giddy to learn that Branch's reaction is very, <em>very</em> different from this morning. </p><p> </p><p>Instead of just putting up with the unwanted affection, Branch yells (something like, <em>"What the- You- Get <b>off </b>me! Are you <b>insane</b>?!"</em>) and roughly shoves her off. </p><p> </p><p>Barb tries and fails to hide her sly grin. "Sorry, bud. I just figured you liked hugs now. Y'know, after this morning with <em>Poppy~?"  </em></p><p> </p><p>Branch's cheeks flush crimson. He sputters incoherently before just scowling at her and storming out of the supply room. </p><p> </p><p>She snickers. <em>Oh, god, it's fucking mutual. </em></p><p> </p><p>This is too good.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Now, this could all just be a coincidence. It's not like Barb's a master FBI agent with a folder containing foolproof evidence that Branch and Poppy like each other. </p><p>Poppy could've been nervous during the Soup incident for any number of reasons. </p><p>Maybe Branch reacted so differently to Poppy's hugs because he's just gotten used to her. </p><p> </p><p>To that, Barb says: <em>bitch</em>, please. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>One day Branch shows up with a scrape on his knee. It's nothing big, really. He clearly just tripped and fell, and knowing that guy, he's obviously had worse. </p><p> </p><p>Does that stop Poppy from not so subtly mother-henning him?  No, of course not. </p><p> </p><p>Poppy firmly drags him by the wrist to the back room, and Barb sneakily follows them because she's seen enough of the real world to know that there <em>is</em> a chance they're... <em>canoodling</em> back there, as Biggie would put it. It is her solemn duty as a minimum wage slacker to make sure they don't dirty the food with their sinful filth. </p><p> </p><p>They're not canoodling, though. Branch is sitting on the rack, shifting awkwardly in place, trying to convince Poppy that he's totally fine. Poppy is having none of it. She kneels in front of him and carefully presses an alcohol pad to the scrape. Branch doesn't even flinch. </p><p> </p><p>A neon blue band-aid is slapped onto his knee after she's done. Branch mumbles a <em>"Thanks," </em>and Poppy gets up and positively <em>beams</em>. </p><p> </p><p>It's so sweet and domestic. It's sickening. Barb wants to throw up. </p><p> </p><p>Poppy comes out with a smile on her face and her friends, who have apparently missed Branch's rare display of affection, lead her on into a conversation about Satin's boyfriend, who just landed a job as a nude model. </p><p> </p><p>When a rampage of overworked college students, among other, tired adults come in around 10:30, the incident is forgotten.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Another time, a lady with cat-eye sunglasses and a "can-I-speak-to-the-manager" haircut strolls in, LV handbag hanging on her elbow. </p><p>Poor, unfortunate Poppy is working at the register when the lady, who Barb will call 'The Karenator' for the sake of convenience, marches forward and demands something that sounds really, really complicated - something like strawberry-peppermint and a shot of pumpkin spice with cold soy milk and white chocolate, all at a temperature of 120 degrees. And a triple chocolate donut. </p><p>Poppy manages a smile and clearly tries her absolute best with the order, but The Karenator simply snaps that she took too long, takes a sip of the drink, then-</p><p> </p><p>Spits it out. </p><p> </p><p>On the floor. </p><p> </p><p>What a <em>bitch</em>.</p><p> </p><p>The Karenator turns to Poppy, with rage brimming behind her sunglasses. Barb didn't exactly hear the entire exchange, but Poppy must've done something wrong somehow, because now The Karenator is screaming something at poor Princess Pink, who looks like she's only minutes away from bursting into tears. </p><p> </p><p>Barb is about to just screw the consequences and throw hands right then and there, and from the looks of it Smidge and the twins are too, but Branch, who was previously scowling at a bag of coffee beans like it wronged his entire family, beats all of them to the punch. </p><p> </p><p>He nudges Poppy away with a gentleness none of them knew he had, and instructs her to head to the back room and restock on donuts. It's a bullshit excuse and they all know it, but if it keeps Poppy from crying then they're not gonna comment. </p><p> </p><p>Branch switches from gentle to stone cold in a hot second when he turns to face the Karenator, bitch face dialed up to 11. He crosses his arms and looms over the now, slightly shaking woman because angry Branch is intimidating as fuck, and he promptly denies her service and more or less throws her out. </p><p> </p><p>Poppy shoots him a grateful look later and the only sign that he actually acknowledges it is the smallest of smiles that blooms on his face. Once he's out of Poppy's sight of course. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>You'd think it would die down, at some point or another. </p><p> </p><p>It does not.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>If anything, they get sweeter. </p><p> </p><p>It comes to her attention that Branch has taken to walking Poppy home after she'd almost gotten mugged one day. </p><p> </p><p>Poppy has no issue with telling her, in detail, about how someone jumped her and had almost taken her phone. Except Branch had shown up at just the right time, and - get this - fucking <em>judo flipped</em> the guy. Then told him to fuck off. The phone was unharmed, thank god. </p><p> </p><p>"He's just so great," Poppy says sort of dreamily. Then she catches herself and blushes. "...Great friend! Yup, he is such a great... friend."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Then there's the incident no one talks about. </p><p>The short version is this: Branch has... well, he has a meltdown. </p><p>Barb's not exaggerating this or even trying to paint Branch in a melodramatic light. Branch literally, actually, in the middle of his shift, <em>breaks down</em>.</p><p>It's kinda horrific, to see someone so strong look so <em>scared</em>. He hyperventilates and thrashes and yells and even cries a little bit and only lets Poppy get close. She carefully, gently takes him to the back room and closes the door behind her. For once, Barb and the others know better than to eavesdrop, so no one really knows what the hushed whispers and soothing voices were about. </p><p>Branch goes home early that day. For the rest of her shift, Poppy looks incredibly anxious. And if Barb sees her pack a chocolate donut and buy a coffee with her employee discount, obviously not for herself, she doesn't comment.</p><p>(No one ever badmouths Branch again after that.)</p><p> </p><p>Then there's one of Barb's favorite moments. She doesn't work here 24/7, so she doesn't exactly know how Poppy's prized guitar broke. Something about Cooper and a lit match and fire and then Branch trying to put it out. </p><p>But she does know that while Poppy never shows any blunt ill-will to either Branch or Cooper, the positive, sunshine-y aura and spark in her eyes dims a little bit in the days that follow. </p><p>She also knows that two weeks later,  Branch gifts Poppy with a brand new one. It's got fun little patterns and looks just as lame as the last one. </p><p>Poppy is so happy she cries. Which makes Branch<em> incredibly</em>  uncomfortable, it's honestly so funny, but he lets her hug him and awkwardly pats her back.</p><p>Barb would probably be teasing them relentlessly for their utter sweetness if it wasn't for Carol, the super hot electric keyboard player who often comes in wearingblack leather and fishnet tights and some kind of punk Fall Out Boy shirt. </p><p>Barb has a bit of a crush on her. </p><p>Barb is also very subtle about it, unlike <em>some</em> people, but Poppy always sends her knowing looks whenever Carol comes in because apparently when it comes to her <em>other  </em>friends, Poppy's crush detector is very, very effective.</p><p>The very last thing she needs is to be teased for it because she is a cool, awesome person and cool, awesome people do not get teased for their crushes on hot girls.</p><p> </p><p>So she'll just... keep quiet and let them work it out. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>It's been nearly two months and they're <em>still</em> not together.</p><p> </p><p>Poppy thinks Branch is just being nice and doesn't actually return her feelings, from the looks of it. </p><p>Branch is too busy wallowing in his own head to realize that every time Poppy hugs him what she really wants is to jump his bones. </p><p>Poppy's friends are heavily convinced Poppy has a crush on some guy named Creek. </p><p>(Barb meets him later, when he comes by the coffee shop in neon yellow yoga pants and ombré hair. He orders a green tea and sorta flirts with Poppy, completely ignoring the murderous stares Branch directs at him every time Poppy's back is turned. He makes it clear that he loves yoga and meditation and channeling good vibes, but like, in the most obnoxious way possible. </p><p>They think Poppy is<em> in love</em> with this bitch? <em>Really</em>?)</p><p> </p><p>It's only on a Wednesday afternoon during Barb's 12 a.m. to 7 p.m. shift when she overhears the twins and DJ gossiping about Poppy and Creek-</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>"Did you notice the way he looked at her?" Satin giggles. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"He obviously likes her." Chenille agrees. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Creek and Poppy would be so cute together, it makes me feel so lonely," DJ chimes in</em>
</p><p> </p><p>-and Barb abruptly comes to the realization that she, a punk rock chick who listens to hard rock and hard rock exclusively and sleeps in late and will be described as a total slacker by almost everyone who knows her, is possibly the most competent person in this entire shop. </p><p>That... That's terrifying. </p><p>But it also only further proves that if Barb doesn't step into... whatever is going on with Branch and Poppy, then no one else will and both of them will wind up alone and miserable (in Branch's case) or stuck with someone boring and possibly manipulative (Poppy, because for all her positive qualities she wouldn't be able to see the bad in her friends if they yelled it in her face). </p><p>And goddammit, Barb will <em>not</em> leave those insufferable fucking morons to that fate.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Branch would probably never make the first move unless the world was ending and they were all about to die and he for some reason wasn't camped out in his survival bunker (yeah. He actually has one of those), so the only chance Barb has of making 'Broppy' happen is to get to Princess Pink. </p><p> </p><p>Barb shivers a bit on the park bench, and internally regrets her decision to not wear a hat or a scarf or maybe wear a bigger jacket, but like hell if she's gonna give up the aesthetic she's kept up since she was ten, where she went through what the adults in her life (sans Dad, because he was always a supportive dude) would call an emo phase, except they eventually realized with growing horror that it was not, in fact, a phase. </p><p>The air is cold and by this rate, there's gonna be heavy snowfall in December. Barb's fingers itch for a smoke, but she'd promised her old man she'd quit and it's not like she wants to disappoint the <em>one</em> person who was always there for her, so she pops a breath mint in her mouth instead. It makes her gums feel like ice. </p><p>She absentmindedly checks her phone, where the only notification is a text Poppy had sent her, confirming she'd be at the park soon. </p><p>Barb waits for about two more minutes before a familiar face, all bundled up in a hot pink ski jacket and fuzzy kitten earmuffs and white boots flashes her a big, toothy smile. Wisps of bubblegum pink locks are blown to the side with the cool, November breeze. In Poppy's hands are two hot chocolates, from the looks of it. </p><p>Barb takes one and pats the space next to her. Poppy sits down, blowing at her hot chocolate to cool it down a bit. Barb tilts her head and drinks it as is, like a cool person, like she's been doing for the past three years, and the gobsmacked expression on Poppy's face is almost enough to make her forget the burning in her mouth. </p><p>The minutes pass by in polite silence as Poppy sips from her own hot chocolate, which is heavily topped with whipped cream, Barb notes. </p><p> </p><p>"So," Barb says, trying to sound nonchalant, "when are you gonna tell Branch you wanna fuck him, but like, with your feelings?" </p><p> </p><p>Poppy promptly chokes on her hot chocolate. Barb pats her back. </p><p> </p><p>"I- I'm sorry, <em>what?! </em>" </p><p> </p><p>Barb shrugs. "You heard me. You're not subtle, Popsqueak. That or I'm just really smart." </p><p> </p><p>Poppy, the precious soul, is seemingly still in denial. "Don't call me that. And what makes you so sure I like him, huh? He's so... uptight!"</p><p> </p><p>"You know you like it rough."  </p><p> </p><p>Poppy sputters and glares at her. Except this is Poppy, and Poppy can't glare to save her life.</p><p> </p><p>"It's not like it's one-sided! Just ask him out if you like him so much, Jesus," Barb says.</p><p> </p><p>"Oh yeah? Well, if it's so easy, then why don't you ask out Carol, huh?" </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Trying to change the subject, are we? Well, two can play at that game. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>"Okay," Barb says coolly. </p><p> </p><p>Poppy holds up a finger, as if to say something, then drops it and blinks. "You- Wait, what?" </p><p> </p><p>Barb rolls her eyes. </p><p> </p><p>"You should probably get your hearing checked, Popsicle. I<em> said</em>, I'll ask out Carol if you ask out Branch. And if you don't ask out Branch either way, I'll never speak to you again."</p><p> </p><p>Poppy gapes. <em>"Never?"</em> </p><p> </p><p>"Well, obviously not never," Barb amends. "But I will do that angsty teen drama thing where I push people away cause I'm afraid I'll hurt them and slowly spiral into an endless pit of despair, self destruction and bad choices. And I also won't ask out Carol." </p><p> </p><p>Poppy contemplates this for a second. Then she squares up her shoulders and puts on a confident smile. "Okay. Okay! I can do this!" </p><p> </p><p>Barb grins, internally fist pumping. "Hell fucking yeah, you can."</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Monday comes around with a fresh new rush of overworked college students trying to find some way of staying awake when the welcome bell chimes and Carol, in all her curvaceous,' I-don't- really-give-a-fuck' glory, walks in. </p><p>Barb has the luck of being at the register, and she quickly smoothes her hair into something more chill. Y'know. Just in case she's not into mohawks or something. </p><p>Carol strolls up to the counter, baby blue hair swept into a pixie cut, ear piercings glistening in the sunlight, the corners of her mouth turned upwards in cool little smile. "Coffee. Black, please," she says, handing Barb a five dollar bill. </p><p>Then, get this - she <em>winks. </em>She winks, and then says in a voice that even sounds a little bit seductive, "Keep the change." </p><p>And, well, Barb's never really been the type to just stop and think, has she? </p><p> </p><p>Carol doesn't seem put off when Barb places her hands on the counter and leans into her space, smirking. In fact, she almost looks amused.</p><p> </p><p>"Gee, I dunno," Barb says slyly. "That doesn't seem fair. How about I give you my number to even out the odds, huh?" </p><p>Thanks to masterful stealth-texting and a little (accidental) help from Poppy, Barb finishes her shift with a smug smile and a date on Thursday. </p><p>She screenshots Carol's text and forwards it to Poppy. Underneath, she sends two simple yet effectively threatening words: </p><p> </p><p>
  <em><b>[To Princess Popsicle]</b>: Your turn. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>It actually ends up happening in the worst way possible. Because, y'know, it's Poppy and Branch.</p><p> </p><p>A coffee pot is accidentally shoved off the table and falls to the ground. The coffee leaks all over the floor and the coffee pot shatters into a bunch of pieces. In her panic to fix her mess, Poppy scrapes the palm of her hand with a rather large piece of glass. She hisses in pain. </p><p> </p><p>Like a demon that's just been summoned, Branch is by her side in an instant, helping her up and taking her to the back room, where the band-aids are kept. While Biggie sweeps up the glass and cleans up the coffee, Barb follows Poppy and Branch and peeks through the crack in the door.</p><p> </p><p>"-don't have to, it was my own stupid mistake," Poppy says frantically. </p><p>"Shut up," Branch says gruffly. But there's also a hint of concern there, so she figures this is the Branch way of expressing how much he cares, or something. Then he looks up. "It was an accident. Don't worry about it." </p><p>He finishes bandaging her hand. Poppy smiles brightly and makes her way to the door. Barb shifts away so they won't pick up on  the fact that she was listening.</p><p> </p><p>(Here. This, right here, is how it happens.) </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Over her shoulder, Poppy says, "Thanks so much for your help, Branch. I love you."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Barb doesn't get to see Branch's expression before Poppy comes out of the back room-</p><p>-and promptly collapses. Good thing Barb's there to catch her. </p><p> </p><p>"Okay, so, that's not really what I meant when I said to tell him," Barb says. </p><p>"I want to die," Poppy whispers, words muffled in Barb's chest. </p><p> </p><p>"Too bad. You told him, you can't back down now." </p><p> </p><p>Poppy lifts her head a little. "How is he?" </p><p> </p><p>Barb squints through the crack in the door, where Branch is standing totally still. His eye is twitching a little bit. "Probably having a stroke." </p><p> </p><p>The girl in her arms releases a heavy sigh. "I'm gonna have to go back in there, aren't I."</p><p> </p><p>Barb nods and condescendingly pats her head. "Yup. Don't worry though, if things look like they're about to go south, I can just run  in there and bite him while you escape and flee the country." </p><p>Poppy scowls. "You're not biting him." </p><p>"Oh, yeah. Sorry, I forgot that was your job."</p><p>"<em>Barb! </em>" Poppy squawks indignantly. </p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Poppy goes back in there. </p><p>Barb, because she's  both a great friend and a nosy bitch, stands outside and observes the entire thing. For science, of course. </p><p> </p><p>Branch is just staring at her. Poppy shifts and looks mortified. </p><p> </p><p>"So, about that last bit," Poppy starts out. </p><p>Branch's face shifts into something that looks like his usual, monotone expression, but it's not the same. He actually looks a bit... hurt? </p><p>"Don't worry, I get it. It was a total accident, you didn't mean it, lets just move on with our lives." He tries to push past her, but Poppy frantically grabs onto his arm. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>"No!" </em>
</p><p> </p><p>He looks confused. "...What?" </p><p> </p><p>"I," Poppy's face flushes crimson.  "I did. Mean it, I mean." </p><p> </p><p>Now he looks surprised. "What." </p><p> </p><p>"I meant it, Branch. I <em>mean</em> it. And sure, it was literally the most horrible way to tell you, and I know you deserve a better confession, but it's the truth." She grabs his hands in hers and looks deep into his eyes. </p><p> </p><p>From behind the door, Barb grins and pumps her fist. "Aw, yeah!" she whispers. </p><p> </p><p>"I love you, Branch. I love you so... mocha," Poppy adds on awkwardly. </p><p> </p><p>Barb's face falls. "Oh, no." </p><p> </p><p>But Branch doesn't seem disturbed by the accidental pun. Instead, he just blurts out, "Neat."</p><p> </p><p>Barb facepalms so hard Chenille, who is adding on whipped cream to a customer's drink, flashes her a concerned look. </p><p> </p><p>Branch makes up for it by tenderly cupping Poppy's face in his palms and leaning in for a kiss. </p><p> </p><p>At least they're not total disasters. </p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Barb takes everything back. They are total diasters. </p><p> </p><p>On Wednesday, two days after Poppy confessed to Branch, they tell the rest of the staff of their newfound relationship status.</p><p>Again, in the worst possible way. </p><p> </p><p>They don't even actually <em>tell</em> anyone. Except for Barb, who was literally the mastermind behind the entire operation. </p><p> </p><p>Instead, Biggie - who needed to restock on the caramel donuts, which have become very popular among customers recently - walks into the back room, shrieks, pushes himself out and slams the door so hard behind him the sound is audible throughout the entire shop. His face is pale. </p><p> </p><p>"Yo. Bigs. What's up?" </p><p> </p><p>Biggie turns to Barb with the expression of a man who has just seen hell. "It's- It's Poppy," he whispers, sounding horrified. </p><p> </p><p>Smidge makes her way over, eyebrows furrowed. "What? What's wrong?" </p><p> </p><p>"And Branch!" he wails. </p><p> </p><p>"What's wrong with them?" pipes in DJ. </p><p> </p><p>"They're... They're-" </p><p> </p><p>"Yeeesssss?" Satin drawls, hands on hips. </p><p> </p><p>"They're <em>CANOODLING! </em>" Biggie blurts out, before he slaps a hand over his mouth. </p><p> </p><p>Dead silence. </p><p> </p><p>Then-</p><p>"Poppy..." Satin starts.</p><p>"And <em>Branch?</em>" Chenille finishes, shocked.</p><p> </p><p>"Talk about a plot twist! I <em>never</em> thought those two would ever end up together," Cooper adds. </p><p> </p><p>Barb heaves a heavy, heavy sigh. "You moronic motherfuckers." </p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Years later, there's a wedding. </p><p>The whole thing is relatively small and simple, because even if Branch is seeing a therapist now and has a healthy support circle of friends to rely on, he still isn't all that comfortable with people. Poppy, being Poppy, was totally fine with that. </p><p>Barb is the maid of honor. Which is pretty weird, considering there are literally dozens of other people who've known Poppy for longer and are much, much, much more qualified for the position. </p><p>Then again, Barb was the one who got them together. Maybe this is just paying the favor. </p><p> </p><p>She'd never say this out loud, but Poppy looks really, really good in her dress. Sweetheart neckline, swishy skirt, tulip sleeves and a lace bodice. </p><p>Her hair is still pink and she's wearing a colorful flower crown, but hey. Poppy will be Poppy, especially on the happiest day of her life.</p><p> </p><p>Barb's shocked out of her stupor when Poppy places a hand on her shoulder and gives a small, soft smile. </p><p>"I just wanted to say... thank you. For everything. You mean so, so much to me, Barb, and I can't tell you how much you've changed my life."</p><p>Barb quickly averts her gaze because she fears if she looks Poppy in the eyes right now, she legit might cry. </p><p>"Whatever," she scoffs. "Just... don't hurt Branch. And don't let him hurt you. That's very important. And, uh, don't let this change anything." </p><p>If possible, Poppy's smile glows even brighter. "It won't. I might be getting married to the love of my life today, but you and I? Nothing is going to change, because this-" she waves a gloved hand towards her, "is for now, forever, and always."</p><p>Barb sniffles and rubs at her eyes with her sleeve. She pointedly does not look at Poppy. </p><p>"Ha. Gay." she chuckles weakly, eyes already welling up again. </p><p>"Barb, it is my <em>wedding day, </em>I swear to god!-"</p><p> </p><p>Yeah, it's the best day of Barb's life. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>A/N: Heyo! I just want to clarify: I know Barb isn't canonically a lesbian, but then I just thought of tough Rock girlfriends just bonding over music and just generally balancing each other out so well and then. Yeah. Barb x Carol is a ship now.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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